Perspective….

It’s all in how we look at things, isn’t it? And today I am grateful and thankful that I am learning to see things through His eyes.

I recently participated in a discussion that truly had my head spinning. Not much fazes me anymore. Age, experience, faith that grows stronger with each passing year….somehow I’ve grown accustomed to this life, and truly…not much fazes me. This particular discussion, however, still has me shaking my head in wonder…and still has me probing my faith and the deepest parts of myself….searching. Reassuring myself that God is truly who He says He is…and all is well.

The thing that has me wondering is this. A dedicated, true sister in Christ used the following verse to support her belief that Jonah is…well, Jonah… because of a lack of faith on someone’s part.

“But if EVERY GOOD AND PERFECT GIFT comes from God (James 1:17) we can know that if it’s not good and perfect, it’s from the devil. The devil’s purpose is to kill, steal and destroy (John 10:10).”
…. somehow Jonah’s gifts (mental and physical disabilities) don’t fall into the “good and perfect” category. So following this logic, Jonah’s gifts must be from Satan. And my heart physically ached for this sister in Christ… who is so obviously deceived.

Jonah (and every other believer) was promised that God’s grace is sufficient for this life. He was also promised the reality of a new body, incorruptible, perfect and holy when he leaves this life and comes into Christ’s presence. And in the meantime, God is using Jonah to magnify, glorify and uplift Himself. God’s grace and mercy and goodness and compassion and love and kindness and…..every other good attribute you can name have been manifested in Jonah’s life.

Thank you God today for the ability to see Jonah’s gifts through your perspective….and for the opportunity to sit on the front row of Jonah’s life and watch as You are glorified, magnified and Your name is lifted high.

Perspective. Funny thing, that. Seeing life through the eyes of Christ… what an amazing, terrifying, beautiful, humbling experience. May my eyes ever be opened to Him….

My sisters….

This is an oldie (at least to us old-timers) but is so true. As we’ve been easing back in to the rat race of Jonah’s medical care, I’ve come to realize exactly how true this is. This is for Wendy, Cindy, Jen, Steph, who all listen and understand. They “get it” because they are members of this “sorority”. This is for Ainsley’s Mom, Kira’s mom, Kaylie’s grandma…..all women on the Tracheostomy board who are willing to share their experiences living life with a trached child with me….and outsider looking for a glimpse of what life might hold if we were to trach Jonah again. This is for the woman at Wal-Mart whose child is having a melt down….and our eyes meet and we communicate… without ever saying a word. This is for the woman at the grocery store, who turns away when our eyes meet…. because she doesn’t want to communicate….

Life’s journeys aren’t meant to be travelled alone. One of God’s greatest blessings in my life has been to send these women…..some for a moment, some for an hour, some for a season, and some for a lifetime….as they pass through my life they change the very fabric of my life…. and I thank God today for each and every one of you “sisters”… as we travel this road together.

To You, My Sisters………………………..by Maureen K. Higgins

Many of you I have never even met face to face, but I’ve searched you out every day. I’ve looked for you on the internet, on playgrounds and in grocery stores.

I’ve become an expert at identifying you. You are well worn. You are stronger than you ever wanted to be. Your words ring with experience, experience you culled with your very heart and soul. You are compassionate beyond the expectations of this world. You are my “sisters.”

Yes, you and I, my friend, are sisters in a sorority. A very elite sorority. We are special. Just like any other sorority, we were chosen to be members. Some of us were invited to join immediately, some not for months or even years. Some of us even tried to refuse membership, but to no avail.

We were initiated in neurologist’s offices and NICU units, in obstetrician’s offices, in emergency rooms, and during ultrasounds. We were initiated with somber telephone calls, consultations, evaluations, blood tests, x-rays, MRI films, and heart surgeries.

All of us have one thing in common. One day things were fine. We were pregnant, or we had just given birth, or we were nursing our newborn, or we were playing with our toddler. Yes, one minute everything was fine. Then, whether it happened in an instant, as it often does, or over the course of a few weeks or months, our entire lives changed. Something wasn’t quite right. Then we found ourselves mothers of children with special needs.

We are united, we sisters, regardless of the diversity of our children’s special needs. Some of our children undergo chemotherapy. Some need respirators and ventilators. Some are unable to talk, some are unable to walk. Some eat through feeding tubes. Some live in a different world. We do not discriminate against those mothers whose children’s needs are not as “special” as our child’s. We have mutual respect and empathy for all the women who walk in our shoes.

We are knowledgeable. We have educated ourselves with whatever materials we could find. We know “the” specialists in the field. We know “the” neurologists, “the” hospitals, “the” wonder drugs, “the” treatments. We know “the” tests that need to be done, we know “the” degenerative and progressive diseases and we hold our breath while our children are tested for them. Without formal education, we could become board certified in neurology, endocrinology, and physiatry.

We have taken on our insurance companies and school boards to get what our children need to survive, and to flourish. We have prevailed upon the State to include augmentative communication devices in special education classes and mainstream schools for our children with cerebral palsy. We have labored to prove to insurance companies the medical necessity of gait trainers and other adaptive equipment for our children with spinal cord defects. We have sued municipalities to have our children properly classified so they could receive education and evaluation commensurate with their diagnosis.

We have learned to deal with the rest of the world, even if that means walking away from it. We have tolerated scorn in supermarkets during “tantrums” and gritted our teeth while discipline was advocated by the person behind us in line. We have tolerated inane suggestions and home remedies from well-meaning strangers. We have tolerated mothers of children without special needs complaining about chicken pox and ear infections. We have learned that many of our closest friends can’t understand what it’s like to be in our sorority, and don’t even want to try.

We have our own personal copies of Emily Perl Kingsley’s “A Trip To Holland” and Erma Bombeck’s “The Special Mother.” We keep them by our bedside and read and reread them during our toughest hours.

We have coped with holidays. We have found ways to get our physically handicapped children to the neighbors’ front doors on Halloween, and we have found ways to help our deaf children form the words, “trick or treat.” We have accepted that our children with sensory dysfunction will never wear velvet or lace on Christmas. We have painted a canvas of lights and a blazing yule log with our words for our blind children. We have pureed turkey on Thanksgiving. We have bought white chocolate bunnies for Easter. And all the while, we have tried to create a festive atmosphere for the rest of our family.

We’ve gotten up every morning since our journey began wondering how we’d make it through another day, and gone to bed every evening not sure how we did it.

We’ve mourned the fact that we never got to relax and sip red wine in Italy. We’ve mourned the fact that our trip to Holland has required much more baggage than we ever imagined when we first visited the travel agent. And we’ve mourned because we left for the airport without most of the things we needed for the trip.

But we, sisters, we keep the faith always. We never stop believing. Our love for our special children and our belief in all that they will achieve in life knows no bounds. We dream of them scoring touchdowns and extra points and home runs. We visualize them running sprints and marathons. We dream of them planting vegetable seeds, riding horses and chopping down trees. We hear their angelic voices singing Christmas carols. We see their palettes smeared with watercolors, and their fingers flying over ivory keys in a concert hall. We are amazed at the grace of their pirouettes. We never, never stop believing in all they will accomplish as they pass through this world.

But in the meantime, my sisters, the most important thing we do, is hold tight to their little hands as together, we special mothers and our special children, reach for the stars.

A new chapter….

Yesterday was Jonah’s first day of private speech therapy.  We’ve not done therapy, outside of school, for several years….mainly due to Jonah’ s health.  But we’ve decided that we need help….mainly with activities of daily living (which for an almost 13 year old male child includes shaving, zit cream, and screwing the top back on to the toothpaste tube).  So, we’ve entered the world of private therapy once again…

And Jonah did amazingly well at speech therapy yesterday.  It was a bit frantic….I met Jonah at the front door as he got off the school bus, took his bookbag and handed him a snack and a drink, and hustled him right back out the door for the drive to therapy.  Jonah ate his snack on the way there, and I was relieved to know that he wouldn’t starve to death before we got home to eat supper.  He did well for the therapist….walking down the hall to the therapy room without so much as a look back at me….when did he grow up so much?!?!

As I sat in the waiting room with the other moms and kids I had the opportunity to “observe”.  And again I was reminded of the blessing that is the reality that we are “only” dealing with Down syndrome with Jonah.  As moms tend to do, we started chatting among ourselves.  We talked about our children, the services they were receiving, we griped about school systems… pretty much the norm when you get a group of moms together who have special needs kids.  Then Jonah returned from therapy and immediately went to the toy table and started playing with the other kids.  I spoke to his therapist, and whenI went to round Jonah up, one of the moms stopped me.  And asked me how old Jonah was….I was frozen, with a deer in the headlights look on my face, I’m sure.  I HATE this question….and have on many occasions been tempted to just lie, and shave a few years off Jonah’s age.  But I didn’t.  And this mom, who moments earlier was becoming an acquaintance that I could pass therapy time with….got the deer in the headlights look about her.  Jonah’s Down syndrome didn’t faze her.  His shockingly blue hearing aides went unnoticed.  His coke bottle glasses were accepted as normal….but she couldn’t believe how small he was…and was very quick to point out that HER son was only 6, and larger than Jonah….

Why is it that size matters?  Obesity is frowned upon, and from personal experience with family members, I can say that obese people ARE treated differently.  And for some insane reason, our society treats little people differently too….sigh….it’s always something isn’t it? 

And I hustled Jonah out the door, and didn’t even mind that I still have to boost him in the van (since he’s too short to do it himself) and buckle him up (since he’s not strong enough to pull the seat belt over himself and buckle it up).  Who cares?  I was thrilled with the first day of therapy….and thanking God that Jonah walked himself to the van…..many other of those children there yesterday didn’t have that luxury.  Thank you God today….for the blessing of Jonah…

Easter

Our entire family, except for the little boys, is involved in our church’s Easter Drama.  Larry came home from his costume fitting to inform me to just look for the “Great Pumpkin” and I would find him.  Apparently, his costume is, well….orange.  Shockingly orange, apparently….

Jacob has gotten over his aversion to wearing a “dress”, and is enjoying himself tremendously.  Sarah and I are once again working backstage, ensuring the props are available, the scenes are set up, and providing some of the special effects.  We are all enjoying ourselves tremendously!

Jacob has a (possibly unhealthy) curiosity about the disciple Judas.  We’ve been researching, watching History channel programs and asking everyone we know about this particular disciple.  I won’t gross you out with the details that Jacob is most curious about….but let me just say that it involves Judas’ manner of death.  This curiosity has also led to some extremely interesting conversations regarding pre-destination, and free-will, and God’s omnipotent presence in general.  So it’s entirely possible that this fascination with Judas isn’t a totally bad thing, right?!?!

We’re counting down the days till Easter.  Ever mindful of His blessings… and being reminded of His gift….His son who died so that we might live…. thank you God today for the gift of Your son, Jesus Christ….

What special plans do you have for Easter?  We have celebrated with Larry’s family already, and Easter Sunday around the Edge house will be low key… spent recuperating from this week of rehearsals and performances!

For the latest Jonah update, be sure to check out his website at www.caringbridge.com/visit/jonahedge

Anji

Thanking God for the little things…

My life has become busier and more hectic than I would like. A new job (albeit I work from home, part time, in my PJ’s most days), 4 children and a husband…not to mention a dozen or so chickens….whew. Most days find me blindly running from one “person” to another…this morning I’m the “working Anji”….interrupted by the reality of “teacher Anji” as I help my daughter with her schoolwork….then I morph into “Mom Anji” as the school buses start unloading children in front of my house….”wife Anji” comes next as Larry gets home from work….whew. I’m exhausted just writing about it….

Where is God in all this? The days are too short, the hours too few, and His voice is growing dimmer…. before I lose contact with Him entirely…I need to do “something”….

So I have begun thanking God for things. Even small things. As I go through my day, rather than be frustrated by an unanswered email, I find myself now thanking God for a few extra moments of time…while waiting for an answer I now have time to talk to Him. While standing in line at Wal-Mart, I find myself praying….and sometimes people think I’m nuts, because I get lost in my conversation with God…and ignore those around me. So if you see me standing in the cereal aisle at Kroger, staring blankly at the wall of cereal…don’t assume that I’ve totally lost my mind…I’m more than likely asking God to help me make a cereal choice!

Sunshine, laughter, hugs from my children….I’m discovering more blessings in my day than I ever knew existed….and by “keeping the lines of communication open” between me and Him…I’m benefitting more than I ever imagined….

So the next time you’re stuck in that slow moving checkout lane….look at it as an opportunity, a few stolen moments from your day, and say hello to the Father….He’ll be glad you did… and so will you…

Anji

I’m back…

I realize that it’s now been weeks since I’ve written in this journal. All I can say is that I’ve been so incredibly busy…. that I don’t have time to think, let alone time to write. But that needs to change…so today, I’m jumping back into the blogosphere. And may actually find a few minutes to visit other blogs that I have truly been missing!

Several months ago I wrote about our desire to get out from under some of our debt. Medical bills, credit card bills, etc. Larry and I (and of course Dave Ramsey) sat down and came up with a plan. And it looks beautiful…on paper. Life, on the other hand, laughed at our plan. And decided to throw us a curveball to test our reflexes. We made it through Christmas without going into debt. That is a huge thing. One that I felt proud of, and inspired by. January was going well, with no unexpected financial crises. Then life interfered again…in the form of the huge ice storm, which left us without electricity, heat or hot water for 8 long days. We purchased a kerosene heater, a generator, and several gallons of fuel to run them. There went January….but I can say that with a bit of “creative” bookkeeping, we did NOT go into further debt for these items. That’s good, right?!?! Of course it’s good….

February brought an unexpected, very large, not covered under our extended warranty repair bill for my van. And even Dave couldn’t help us there…. ; ) But once again, we were able to find the money to pay for the repairs, without going further into debt. Which is another good thing….

The debt snowball repayment plan has been put on hold. We are not giving up. We really, really want to be out from under some of these debts. But our timetable for eliminating those has changed….But we feel good about the fact that we weathered TWO very expensive, very unexpected crises…. without furthering our debt.

One of the biggest things that has helped me, is that I now carry cash. For everything. No cards, ever. Period. And that has been more of a change in mindset than anything… It is truly much easier to whip out a card, scan it, and be out the door when making a purchase. I’ve turned into that old lady we all dread to get behind in the stores….paying with cash, sometimes down to the change, and with my large envelope of coupons. In my defense, I DO have my coupons out and ready to use before I enter the line….

We are ready to get back on track, and start tackling some of these debts. We are not discouraged by the setbacks we’ve encountered. More than anything we are grateful for the fact that we were able to weather them without increasing our debt. What more can we ask for?

I did stumble across a blog a few weeks ago that I found….interesting. One family is determine to live on $1,500 this year. That includes food, clothing, household supplies and doctor’s visits. This family is much smaller than ours, with two parents and two very small children. But I’m enjoying reading about their journey….and am always grateful that I don’t get behind HER in the checkout lane. This lady is a coupon GURU….and gets better bargains than I ever imagined possible!!

So tell me, in this new economy, where we’re all feeling our pennies being pinched, what are YOU doing to help? How are you stretching your dollars to make the most of them? Larry and I are expanding our garden this year. We’ve got our organic beef ordered, and it will be ready sometime in May. Trust me, if you want to cut costs at the grocery store…this is the ONLY way to go. Plus, it tastes better, it’s healthier….you’ll never want to go back to “grocery store” beef again….

Homeschooling

We as a family made our decision to homeschool Sarah. She was the deciding factor in our decision. Sarah has for about 2 years now wanted to be homeschooled. Some of her reasons are religious. She was becoming disillusioned and discouraged by the fact that the “friends” she went to church with became totally different “friends” in the school environment. She was tired of not knowing “who” they were on any given day. She was disgusted with the language that was heard daily. Who’s doing what with whom on Saturday night…..She was discouraged and not motivated to work, because of the students who required so much of her teacher’s time. Sarah WANTS to learn and grow. Sarah WANTS to please her teachers. Sarah WANTS to stretch her mind and intellect, and her favorite teachers at public school encouraged that. However, at the end of each day, Sarah was left feeling…empty, dirty, and disillusioned. Some of Sarah’s reasons were academic. Sarah wants to learn about the kingdoms of Israel, from a Bibilical perspective. She wants to know the difference between the Northern and Southern kingdoms, and wants to “see” how God has protected them, stood by them, and ultimately will renew the country of Israel. Sarah wants to spend time daily in the Scriptures, learning, questioning, growing.

So, after Christmas, Sarah and I went to her high school, returned his laptop, her books, her ID. We signed all the legal papers, making me ultimately responsible for her education. And together we are building her curriculum, based on what SHE wants to learn. It’s still a work in progress, and we are still waiting for her Bible curriculum to arrive in the mail. Each day that brings a new box is like Christmas time around here! We try and guess what’s inside, and then we rip it open and exclaim with excitement at what lays inside the box. We are both excited, enthusiastic, and wishing we had done this years ago. But it’s all in God’s time. And we are happy with that. Two years ago, when Sarah first REALLY began talking about this, it would have been impossible for us to do this. But today, as I look over next week’s lessons plans, I am thanking God for His provisions, and His blessings that allow me to stay at home full time, and become a major player in Sarah’s education.

This semester Sarah has a pretty heavy load. Perhaps we’ve been a bit ambitious…and then perhaps not. Chemistry is getting us both down. She took her second test yesterday….and received a failing grade. It’s not as bad as it sounds though. She is struggling with the math computations. She understands the concept, but is having trouble in how she is expressing her answers. She is so close…for instance, if the answer is 12.04, Sarah’s answer is 12.036987. So, next week we are backing up, looking at the second chapter again, and trying to figure out how the curriculum wants her to express her answers. Please, pray that we can figure this out. We are not alone in this, however. Chris, a dear friend and the Education Minister from our church, holds a degree in Chemistry. Coincidence? No, I believe it’s God providing for our needs in a manner than only He can manage. So, as soon as Chris finishes up a little project he’s working on (actually he’s writing his thesis, and it’s NOT a little project!!) he will begin working with her weekly. I don’t know who’s more relieved that January is coming to a close….Chris because he’ll be finished with his thesis, or me, because it means he’ll have the time to help us on a weekly basis!

Sarah’s math class is actually going well. She is doing Geometry, again. We both felt she needed a repeat, to help build the foundation stronger. She really does struggle with Math, so she saw the benefit in repeating Geometry, too.

English is interesting. And the curriculum that Sarah chose is awesome! One day this week Sarah had every Bible we own in the house spread out in front of her. I wondered what in the world she was doing….and her response was “English”. She just needed different translations to understand the etymology behind certain words. I hope she found what she needed, cause we’re out of translations. We may need to raid Chris’ office for reference books, if this continues!

Sarah’s History and Geography class in interesting, too. It is exactly what she wanted to study. She is beginning at the Creation, and working her way through to the Persian empire. This is a totally Scripture based curriculum, so there will be no Darwin influence, and no theory of evolution to muddy the waters. She is loving this one!

We are currently looking for an elective that she is interested in. She thinks she want to learn to knit…. which is all good, as long as I don’t have to help her. I have no patience for things like that. And if I get a knot in my yarn…my solution is to cut it out, mend the hole, and start again. Which makes for some very “knotty” creations. Perhaps there’s a “Dummies Guide to Knitting”…. hmmm… now there’s an idea.

Sarah’s days are full. She is thrilled beyond words. She helped choose her curriculums, her input was considered, and the subjects she chose reflect her personal interests. How much better could it be? Yeah, well, we’ll find out next year where her science class calls for disecting a fetal pig. Gulp….I can do this. I can do this. I can do this….

For those who have asked, we chose our curriculum based on several different factors. Obviously, we have to teach the Core subjects that are required for all school aged children to learn. English, Math, Geography, Science…. but the beauty of homeschooling is that WE control what is actually encompassed on those subjects. We are using a mixture of different curriculums. For the most part we settled on Alpha and Omega publisher’s “LifePac” curriculums. This is PERFECT for a first time homeschool experience. The lessons are already planned. They arrive on your doorstep pre-packaged, printed, and ready for use. Each subject contains ten books. These books are consumable, containing both the text and the pre-tests, self-tests, etc. The Instructors guide contains additional text, and the tests and answer keys. What that means for me is that, since I already have a lesson plan, I can focus on each day’s assignment and classwork. I am so thrilled with this curriculum and would recommend it to anyone! For Chemistry, we are using Apologia’s “Exploring Creation through Chemistry”. And I really like this one too. It’s not quite as structured, but the test is easily readable, very easy to follow and understand, and there are built in checkpoints that allow Sarah to KNOW if she is struggling, or if she is mastering, the subject at hand. Currently she is struggling…but we are hoping to change that! Next week she and I together are going to review her most recent chapter, and see if we can figure out some of the math problems she is facing.

Who knew I would ever homeschool one of my children? Not me, certainly. But God does some pretty amazing things. Like, using me to help mold, guide and educate Sarah. Who in the world would have ever thought?!?! Isn’t He amazing? And yes, we have considered the benefits of homeschooling the other children. Jacob is not interested. Period. He play football, and if that means he must go to public school, then go to public school he will. And that’s OK with us. Jonah is still benefitting from the Special Education services he receives through the public school system. So he, too, will remain there as long as it is beneficial for him. Levi….hmmm….he’s the question. I can already see the negative effects from public school in him. But he is so young….Can I really teach him the “basics” that he needs to know to be an independent learner? I just don’t know. So for now, he too remains in public school. With the very real possibility of coming home in the future to finish his education. He would love it. I am certain of that. But I’m just not certain that it is the correct time for him, yet.

Overall, we are loving our foray into homeschooling. Currently Sarah is at a friend’s house. She spent the night last night, and is spending today just hanging out. She enjoys the company of her peers at church on both Sundays and Wednesdays every week. Plus all the additional activities that are thrown in the mix. She has had two girlfriends over to spend the night with her. So for those who have questioned whether her socialization needs will be met here at home….let me just say that yes, Sarah’s need for friends is being met. In a big way. And in case you’ve never seen Sarah in the company of adults, teens, children, seniors….I don’t really worry about that aspect anyway. Sarah’s personality is fully developed. And what a delightful personality it is!

So, anyone else out there reading who has tackled homeschooling? What curriculums do you use? Why? Any tips for a new homeschooling family?

Busy is good…right?

Oh my gosh. I can’t believe I am about to say (type) this, but I have been so busy that I totally forgot about blogging. Can you imagine such a thing? Me neither, until it actually happened to me!

Christmas was a wonderful, joy-filled celebration this year. Jonah did get sick on us about 3 days before Christmas Day. Really, really sick. But, he is totally recuperated now, and we made it through the holidays AT HOME, with no hospital stays. You can’t know what a blessing that was.

I have begun my duties as new Executive Director of our local Down syndrome Association. I am loving it. Very, very busy. Lots of new stuff to learn. We are jumping into the new year feet first, and I am trying to hit the ground running. Since I work from home, most days find me on my laptop, phone in reach, in my PJ’s. Can you IMAGINE such a blessing?!? That has to be the absolute best thing about this new job. I can work where, when and dressed however I want! How did I get to be so blessed? And within these few weeks, I’ve discovered something about myself. It feels GOOD to use my talents and skills. Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love being at home with my children, and THAT is my most important “job” right now. But I’ve found a way to do that, and still have something of my own. Something that brings me joy, personal satisfaction, and also brings in a bit of income. All without endangering my ability to be a full time stay at home mom. Wow. Trust me when I say that I know EXACTLY how blessed I have been in this.

Larry and I were able to get away by ourselves for a few days right after the first of the year. It had been waaaayy too long since we’d done that. It rained and was cold and foggy the entire time we were gone. But that’s OK. We enjoyed our time together, and scoped out a few really cool potential vacation sites. We found a lodge that the kids will absolutely love. We’re hoping to spend a few days there this summer, before Jacob’s football practices interfere. On Saturday nights, they hold a “hoedown” on a small island on their property. If I can keep Jonah from falling in and drowning, he’ll absolutely love it! Jonah, outdoors in the summer time, music and dancing, lots of new hands to shake…. this kid will be beside himself!

So, how has your new year begun? Good, bad, ugly? As far as resolutions go, I don’t have any. My plan for this year is to “go with the flow” and see where I land. Learning to let go, and let life happens just may be the best thing that happens to me this year. What about you?

Anji

Christmas 2008

What a blessed Christmas season we have been enjoying! Check it out…

Jonah and Levi both spent lots of time lying on the floor looking at the tree and/or the presents.  Not certain which one was so fascinating to them…

I had to bribe Jonah into looking at the camera, rather than the tree, by allowing him to hold a present.  Here, I’ve just informed him that he can’t OPEN the present…he can just hold it.  His expression says it all….even if he can’t speak he lets me know when he’s displeased!!

Here are the kids on Christmas Eve, celebrating with all their cousins.  Aren’t they a fine looking group of kids…discounting the “homeboy” in the sock cap…..who just rolled out of bed after an afternoon nap…and the sock cap was a better alternative than his hair.  Trust me….

And I included this picture of Sarah, just because her legs are too short to touch the ground while sitting in the recliner.  And I found it funny… and of course, she did not see the humor in this…..

And this is my Mom and Dad….and they hate to have their picture taken.  When I told my dad I was going to post his picture on my blog… he looked slightly confused and then smiled.  He has no idea what a blog is….but is too polite to ask….

Jonah, charming his Nana.  It doesn’t take much effort on his part….

The smile says it all.  I am now officially the “best mom in the whole world”…..according to Levi.

And this is Jacob.  With “the” gift of the year….my athletic, academically talented, socially outgoing, oldest son can NOT shuffle a deck of cards to save his life.  So I bought him an automatic card shuffler….I’m not certain, but I may not have gotten his vote for “best mom in the whole world”….

Christmas at the Edge house was a very blessed, very special time this year.  It’s been a hard year.  And for this week…we are thankful for our blessings, ever mindful of Him who bestows those blessings, and we are always, always, always grateful for our wonderful friends and family.  Who are quite possibly the biggest blessings of all.

I pray that each one of you had a Christmas as wonderful as ours….

Anji

Lost my religion….

Have you ever heard the old saying “that was enough to make a preacher cuss!!”?  My mom used to say that when we were younger…and I’m assuming she was substituting this phrase for what she really wanted to say. Which was curse words…but I digress.  I finally experienced this first hand in my life on Monday.  I’ve been angry before.  Trust me.  I’m no stranger to anger.  But I’ve never been so angry that I didn’t care who was listening (Sarah was with me on this day), what their feelings were, or what other people thought (the greeter at WalMart is probably still traumatized). 

You might recall that we had family pictures made a few weeks ago.  On two separate occasions, because the first attempt just didn’t work out for us.  I requested a different photographer for the second session, in the hopes that she/he would relate to Jonah a bit better than the first one.  I was upset to find that we had the same photographer…but in her defense, she did a much better job.  And I was much more articulate about what she could do/say to help Jonah understand what she wanted him to do.  So, I was pleased with our family pictures.  And thrilled beyond words with the shot that she ended up getting of the four kids together.  It was darn near perfect…and I was happy!  And spent more money than I had planned, but this pose of the kids was too good to pass up.  I have been patiently waiting for our portraits to arrive, and on Monday, trotted into Wal-Mart to pick them up. 

For some reason known only to the lab technicians, some of our pictures are…off.  The shot itself is perfect.  But when they started sizing them, somehow the shot got off center.  In one size of picture, Larry is missing about 1/4 of his face, and Levi is missing an ear.  Hmm….I’m getting a bit upset, especially when I ask to have them re-printed and the photographers response is…less than helpful.  I really lost it when I got to the pictures of the kids…the pictures that I love, and that for once, are good of ALL four of them.  Some of them turned out OK.  Some of them have Sarah missing about 1/3 of her head….grrr…. I’m not happy at this point, and steam is probably starting to wisp out of my ears.  If I’m not careful, I’ll start whistling like a tea kettle.  Wouldn’t that be embarrasing?

So, I took a deep breath, and requested a refund, since the photographer is certain that the lab CAN’T re-print the pictures for me.  I don’t even understand what she was thinking.  Of course they could reprint them… the original picture is fine.  That’s what she couldn’t grasp…She thought we needed to retake the picture.  Which is not what I wanted.  After she made a quick phone call to her supervisor, she was instructed to give me a refund.  I was still upset at this point…yes, I was going to get my money back, but I still had no pictures…. The photographer didn’t have enough money in her drawer to refund my purchase….so her answer to the dilemma was to keep my money, keep my pictures (even the good ones) and send me out of the store empty handed.  With instructions to call the 1-800 complaint number.  I’m fairly certain that my head did a full rotation, and that steam was definitely escaping from my ears at this point.  Suffice it to say that I left there with my pictures…and a shaken Sarah.  Not really, Sarah was as upset as I was…

Anyway, I’ve spent some time feeling guilty about my anger, and the fact that I wasn’t very nice to this woman photographer.  But you know what… she wasn’t nice to me either.  And she was incompetent at doing her job. I understand that you don’t need to be a rocket scientist to take kid’s pictures all day long…but you’ve got to have some intellect.  Right?  And I’ve decided that my anger and words were justified.  And I’m tired of feeling guilty about standing up for myself.  Or my family.  Or my child… So many times women are made to feel…hysterical and emotional.  When in reality they are just standing up for themselves, their families….and I’m not going to feel guilty anymore.   Wow.  This may take some getting used to…